Permission to come aboard Captain Stubing..?

Against all odds, Chiloe was sunny for two days in a row. Perhaps it was Jamie, a Scotish guy I met in Chiloe, who provided the Leprecon's good luck. Jamie, or 'JimmyJimmyJimmy' as called by the Hostel Ladies, was a pure bred Scot, who was never at a shortage for Scotish proverbs and generally reminded me of Sean Connery. His email address of jimrat007@aheavilyusedwebbasedemailservice.com did nothing to sway my argument.

JimmyJimmyJimmy and I met two French girls (who had not been knocked up by Trauco), and the 4 of us made plans to visit the local Penguin sanctuary. Since it is the offseason, no full service tours were leaving from the town, so we hired a taxi* to drive us there, wait for us for 2+ hours and drive us back, all for $30 USD. (In Boston, this taxi ride would cost the same as a months rent payment (assuming your rent is $1,000)/150 nights at Hostel Del Lago/1,000 tubes of chapstick, etc).

We hopped into the Chevrolet Corsa GL (sedan/4 Cyl./6" clearance/100 lb. payload) and drove 45 minutes on roads where Jeep Cherokees and Land Rovers are advisable. At one point, we forged a river, having water seep in through the doors, and drove along a rocky beach, hearing rocks strip what I assume were essential components to the car's operation. Our trip alone must have caused $150 in shock and strut damage.

The Penguins were apparently quite content in their Rookeries that day, as we saw only 3 of them. We did however see two Sea Otters, and 1 Boat captain who liked my French and Scotish compadres, but not me. In addition to being a Gringo, he really took offense to me standing in the boat at one point, and that was the straw that broke the camels back between the skipper and I. As we were leaving, he did the requisite kiss on the cheek with the two French Girls and he embraced Jimmy with a big bear hug. Instead of physical affection for me, he chose to say "Adios Gringo feo". Which means any of the following; "Goodbye bad American," "Goodbye nasty American," or "Goodbye ugly American". I can't totally understand the last one, as I had at least twice as many teeth as he.

*Speaking of taxi's: My college roommate doesn't like paying for them. For the purpose of protecting his identity, I have chosen a pseudonym. Let's call him "Blahvi". One humid evening in DC, Blahvi and his friends pulled the "ride and fly" (or "cab ditch") where typically drunk idiots sprint away from the cab once it stops, leaving the Cabbie with no money. Well, Blahvi did this in his inebriated state and started running away from the cab. Unfortunately, he ran in the same direction as traffic, and the taxi driver pulled up next to him as he was running, and said "what are you doing?? pay me my money". Blahvi wouldn't yield however, adding "stop following me!" as he continued running in a parallel direction with the cab right next to him.. He is now top of his class at Blaw School.

The story is better if you know Blahvi.