Part 2 of the series that has 2 parts

From the rapidly expanding town of Calafate, I flew to Bariloche, Argentina (in a plane) to eat food. I Met friends of friends there, kicked Little Orphan Anne's tush in Ping Pong. Gloated. Soon after, she tore her ACL or some other part of her body. Soon after that, I took a moment to appreciate the fact that I purchased extra healthcare insurance that covers extreme sports. (We have lost a lot of good men out there during ping pong matches). Saw Olga (the bubbling blister) for second and third time. Smiled gleefully when I saw her starting out a 4 day hike. Pretty sure the people she hiked with were not smiling at the end of the hike. Waited 1 hour to buy 5 pieces of chocolate at the Mamushka Store. Went next door and bought $30 worth of chocolate in 3 minutes (for my Santiago Family. not me. perhaps). Rented car with friends, went to hippie town, drank beer, found out the meaning of Celiac (alergic to wheat). Drank Celiac's beer. Nearly threw up. Back in Bariloche, I hungout with the guy who invented the License Plate bags and accessories. His name is Jorge.
Went out until 7AM, caught 10AM bus. I now urge everyone to use the phrase "Do I give you Horn??" instead of "Do I make you Horny??". (assuming anyone actually uses this phrase in the first place).

Bus dropped me and my two medical student friends off in San Martin de los Andes (Smandes), where we rented a Suzuki "Fun". This car barely fit three people, but it lived up to its billing and we drove it to a waterfall. I shaved my beard into a Goatee and looked like a tool. I then shaved my goatee into a mustache and looked like a criminal. I then shaved my mustache and threw on some orange overalls and rabbit ears. I have never looked better. It started raining. This became the general theme for the next week.

Took 6AM bus to Volcano town (Pucon) and checked into the best hostel in the world (And by best I mean worst, and by world I mean world). Feasted in the hot springs with my Israeli comrades and shared my cereal the next morning before attempt #1 to hike the Volcano. Four attempts later, I threw on a nice pastel suit and climbed like a Sherpa-in-training. Was nearly asphyxiated by the sulfur emitting from the top of the volcano, and then we slid down the mountian, which produced 5 of the most giddy 25-40 year old grown men you have ever seen. Went back to hostel, struggled with the directions to take a shower and left the next day to Validivia to watch the rain, Sportscenter and see the Portland Sea Dogs dominate the Valdivia Fish Vendors.

Chiloe was next stop. The second day there, I spent 5 hours on a bus for 1 hour and 15 minutes at a national park. I met James Bond, and two French girls who were not rude to Americans and we went to see Penguins with a boat captain who was rude to one American in particular. I Left the beautiful Island of Chiloe to my last stop off point in Puerto Varas, where I fished (poorly), gambled (poorly) and spoke spanish (guess how).

A 14 hour bus ride later and two ass whoopings on the tenis court by the mom (She took me 6-4, 6-4 today*), I am still kicking.. Although my stomach feels like hell and I hope I didn't speak too soon on the giardia front.

*Ana, the mother, has found my weakspot on the tenis court (aside from my back hand, 1st serve %, my dinky second serve, volleys, an most other tenis related terms), which is the "lobo" (or lob). She will just pop the lob up there confident that I will smash it as hard as I can several inches below the top of the net.