What do you get when you mix John McEnroe, Courtney Love and Little Orphan Annie togther??

Since the conclusion of the Saved by The Bell television show, the understudy (and/or stunt double) for Screech Powers has been working at a Hostel in Bariloche, Argentina. While it seems the word 'zoinks' and low level scams with his blond compadre are a thing of the past, he runs a tight ship and is the human equivalent of Fort Knox (or at least a childproof bottle of Tylenol) when trying to obtain a new towel.

The hostel I am currently staying at is called La Bolsa del Deportes (The Purse of the Sports). While it is difficult to ascertain why they are named after a female carryall, I believe the sports portion of the title is derived from the presence of a foosball and pingpong table. (There is a big playground slide here too, but I believe it is intended more for leisure purposes, as I haven't seen any competitive sliding matches yet.)

There was a heated pingpong game going on when I arrived, and I soon learned that an English girl, with Raggedy Anne red hair (bandana covered), a lower lip ring and a fiery competitive spirit, had quickly become the Forest Gump of the Purse. Her record spoke for itself, as she claimed she was unbeaten. Her boasting of historical events quickly gave way to the postulation that she was would kick the ass of any future competition as well. I think I might have even heard her say she ate her most recent competitor.

I wasn't about to challenge the paddle weilding master, until she approached me to ask if I wanted to participate in a friendly game of table tennis. Trying to impress Dustin Diamond, I accepted her offer and we started a best of 5 match.

She broke only one game ball on an overhead smash, and was visibly without words at the end of the third game. I won 3-0. However, there could be no rejoicing for fear of a flying pingpong paddle to the temple. She made promises of a rematch, however when I returned to the Hostel later that night, I found her hobbling around, having suffered a terrible accident playing...








pingpong.